It’s true and I just realized it.  Yesterday.  My husband and I went for a drive to the beach and along the way I kept seeing “junk” and antique shops.  After my “oohs” and “aahs” I would say, “I really want to go in there!”   To which his response would be some sort of nod or roll of the eyes. (This actually happens on a quite regular basis now)  We saw one place – about a 1/2 acre sized property – littered with sheds, lean-to’s and the likes filled to the brim with everything you could imagine.  A rainbow of glass bottles, a myriad of lawn ornaments and homemade signs reading things like “Mary’s Art Sold Here” and “30 Year Clearance Sale”.  (That one boggled my mind – still does).   It was so cluttered with stuff you could not see in the windows.  We later passed the giant and foreboding antique’s place I’ve always wanted to go in but never have.  My husband said, “looks scary, like something out of a horror movie,” to which I replied “It looks AMAZING!”  This place is an old farmhouse next to the highway.  It’s falling down.  Literally.  A huge sign on the sign reads ANTIQUES but you can barely read it.  To the untrained eye yes, it looks scary.  To me, a virtual treasure trove waiting to be discovered.

So, amidst all of this is when it hit me.  I’m turning in to my mother.  

To better understand we need to go back 25 years.  My parents divorced when I was very young and both re-married in the very early 80′s.  My mom and step-father met at an auction.  An antiques auction.  (Starting to get the picture?)  Every outing, every vacation, every trip we ever took centered around visiting some historic site or some huge antique bizarre/fair/market.  I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve been to Williamsburg.  They even owned an antique shop for a spell and their house is still full to the brim with antiques.  My step-father actually knows two of the guys from Antiques Roadshow.  I’m not kidding.

I never appreciated those things when I was younger but apparently now I do.  They were constantly (and still are) on some sort of hunt for the perfect pipe box or Queen Anne table.  My step-father eventually decided to earn his keep as a cabinetmaker – specializing in antique reproduction furniture.  Today, the older they get, their trips are less frequent and now (of course sans children) are more “vacationey”.  But thanks to the internet and Ebay, they still enjoy the proverbial hunt.

So here I am, twenty plus years later creating vintage inspired jewelry.  Collecting vintage odds and ends and antiquing modern things to look old.  I knew someday parts of my mother would creep in like they do for most women – eventually.  I figured it would be along the lines of constantly nagging and writing notes when I have kids.  Or taking up painting when I get older.  Perhaps having a fondness for all things Italy.  Instead I’ve developed a love for things I HATED when I was growing up.  Old bottles, vintage jewelry… things I can make new again…or better yet, new things I can make old.

Life has a funny way of coming full circle and surprising us (or biting us on the ass).  Instead of shaking my fists in frustration, I’ll embrace the wonderful legacy she has passed on.  I only hope I can pass on something equally rewarding and wonderful to my children.

Never before in my life have I seen a time where this was an everyday mantra.  It could be worse.  Economy sucks? Could be worse.  Lost your job?  Could be worse. Overwhelmed with debt?  Could be worse.  All the time it surrounds us.  From the mouth of the President, to your co-workers and boss, your spouse or partner, to friends and relatives.  It could be worse.

Well, yes, it could always be worse.  But who wants that?  When did believing that things could be BETTER become selfish or even wrong?  In my book…my life…my mind, things not only could be better, they can and will be better.

So where to start getting over this negative mentality?  First I start to assess what I feel could be worse and why; whether these things are out of my control or if they’re something I can change.   For me, the biggest issue is my job.  People are always telling me, “in this economy you’re lucky to even have a job – it could be worse!”.  And yes, I’m lucky to have a job but for me, personally, I don’t really believe my job could get any worse.  If it does, I will surely quit. Just like that.  And some folks may get mad at me there, and that’s ok – everyone is different.  I don’t know your situation and you don’t mind so let’s not judge each other!  :)

Now, if I think about how my job could be BETTER, I already feel some of the weight lifting.  There are few aspects of my job I can control but my mentality towards my job I can – in a heartbeat.  If I go to bed anxious, dreading the morning I’ve already sabotaged the next day.  If I fall asleep really thinking and believing that tomorrow could be worse, I’m pretty sure it will be.  But, if I take a few minutes to think of things I can do at work to make my day a little better, then I’ve already succeeded.  Take today for instance.  I woke up angry, anxious and dreading going to work.  I arrived at work worse for wear after my commute.  By 8:30 I was ready to go postal.  Now here it is, 10:00 am and I’ve taken some deep breaths and have stepped away from “work” to write a blog.   I made an active decision to take a break, calm down and do something for myself.

Instead of focusing on what is wrong with my job right now, I need to concentrate on the good things – where this job will take me.  Eventually it will let me save enough money to QUIT MY DAY JOB and go full-time with jewelry and crafts.  Thinking about that, well, that makes me KNOW that things not only could be but will be better.

Now, to apply this thinking to the rest of my life – on a grander scale – this will be an ongoing blog topic so stay tuned!